Images: Shutterstock.com

In the constant struggle of trying to get and keep a guy, it’s essential to know what they don’t like to avoid it, writes Sonja Svensek…

Living in an era where celebrities determine our next fashion buys, our fashion trends, and the type of men who are worthy to be with, we start the never-ending struggle of trying to get the man of our dreams. Sadly, people think that a nose job, a quick tuck here and there, and a change of hair colour and style will spur him to be with us. The notice part they will. But don’t think for a minute that he will be impressed. Most men will admit that confidence in a woman is the biggest turn-on. It doesn’t matter what you’re wearing, but if you feel good in your own skin, they’ll want to know you more:

1. The Insecure Woman
‘Oh you think I’m pretty? Nah. You haven’t seen me in the morning.’ ‘How can you think this dress is flattering; can’t you see the size of my behind?’ Do these comments sound familiar to you? Whenever you get complimented, you seem to have the urge to put it down and devalue yourself. Men find this very annoying. If a man compliments you, take it with pride. You deserve it! We work ever so hard to look great. Reap your rewards!

2. The Blabbing Woman
Yes, I think we all guessed this would come as one of men’s biggest turn-offs! But, it isn’t how much you say, it’s what you say. If a man hears you gossiping and whining, it says more about who you are than the victims you’re bad-mouthing. If you need to vent, call your best-friend; that’s what she’s there for! We also tend to magnify all problems, whereas men try to find solutions. So, after a few sentences he would tune out and focus on the TV instead of what you’re saying.

3. The Silent Woman
Men love talking about themselves. However, a man who is genuinely interested in his partner wants to know about her as much as he can as well. Now, if you don’t ask questions or expand on the conversation, he will only think you aren’t interested in him, or even worse, a complete bore to talk to. Speak up! Ask about his day, his thoughts, or what inspired him to do whatever he’s working on. If something is on your mind, tell him. If you’re upset about something, discuss it. All men will agree that what drives them crazy is knowing that something is bothering you and you reply with “It’s nothing.” 

4. The Careless Woman
It’s not right to believe that all men want an Angelina Jolie clone for a wife, but they want you to make the most of what you have. A survey showed that the following are some of the biggest turn-offs when it comes to women’s appearance: chipped nail polish, body odour, unhealthy diets, bad breath, moustaches, unshaven underarms and legs, wearing tent-like dresses around the house, over-styled and processed hair, and too much makeup. Take care of yourselves and make the most of your looks without over doing it.

5. The Superficial Woman
On the other side of the coin, men don’t want to be staring at your caked-up face instead of your skin. Though men appreciate the effort you put into looking good, they get turned off by women who always feel the need to constantly impress and who take hours to get ready. An absolute turn-off is for a woman to re-apply her lipstick every two minutes or check herself in every passing mirror. Be yourself, be natural, and learn what suits you best and works for you.

6. The Masculine Woman
It’s innate in men to feel attracted to a woman who isn’tafraid to be feminine. Accept him opening doors for you or tucking you in your chair at dinner. Don’t cause a scene or refuse. Be conscious of how you walk, talk, and even chew your food. A woman trying to be too masculine is a turn-off, regardless of the lady’s suit-and-tie fashion. By you being more of a woman, he will naturally feel more of a man.

7. The No-Joke Woman
One of the most things men enjoy is knowing that a woman can laugh at herself. We were told to ‘act like ladies’ since we were young, but that doesn’t mean to be serious all the time. Crack a joke, make him feel at ease, and he will love you for it. If he tries to be funny and you reject him, he will feel that you’re putting him down and that you’re better than him. As soon as a man feels that he can’t win, he’s out the door.

8. The Ditzy Woman
Jessica Simpson might have seemed cute and attractive at firstto ex-husband Nick Lachey, but it was only a matter of time for him to get annoyed by her cute-yet-ever-so-annoying-habits. Talking in a baby voice was cute when you were six years old; do it when you’re twenty-six and he’ll think you need medication! Being sweet is one thing, acting like a candy doll is something else!

9. The Needy Woman
Though a man feeds off a woman’s desire to need him, he’ll run a mile as soon as you show that you can’t live without him. If you start calling him ten times a day asking where he was and who with, he will only feel disgusted by your insecurity and shut himself out. On the other hand, a woman playing the victim in too many situations makes men feel choked. Tell yourself a man should be supplementary and complementary, not someone to complete you.

10. The Gold-Digger Woman
Men want flashy cars and bling for a reason, to attract. But once they realize that this is the only thing you’re interested in, they will run! They will feel evaluated, and over time, used. The worst thing for a manis to have a girl check out his car, shoes, and watch ONLY. Men don’t like feeling that they’re just an ATM.

11. The EX Woman
Men enjoy learning more about their partner’s interests, likes, and dislikes, but draw the line when it comes to past relationships. You were engaged or married before? Fine. But going into details about what a creep or hunk your ex was, will make him feel insecure and the need to always try to upstage him, or he might interpret it that you only seem to go for creeps. Leave the past in the past!

12. The Nagging Woman
Men don’t like to have a women eat like a horse then complain about her weight; or stuff her face with junk food and complain about her skin breaking out. They can’t stand it when you exaggerate a minor obstacle. Complain that he smells yes, but not about yourself, which is your own wrong doing! You’re digging your own grave and they will be very willing to place you in it if you continue to whine and complain.

Men from different cultures will most definitely find different turn-offs compared to others, but the similarities are there. They want a partner, a friend, a lover, a soul mate. Not a second mother, a nag, and a brag. If it means you need to take time off to learn more about yourself and what your true ‘authentic product’ is as Dr.Phil would say, then take time off to discover yourself. Then, knock him out!